Across the country there are young boys and men who are petrified of speaking to women, in many cases they will avoid it altogether. I was once like this and before I started to court my now wife, I had a very low success rate with the girls. Someone who certainly did not have bad luck with the women was my friend from Wesson Eric Wetlaufer who had quite the gift when it came to speaking to women and was very rarely declined a date. Eric always had female company when going up and last week I sent him an email to see if he would contribute to this article, to offer tips on how to approach a girl. Eric said yes and sent me these frank and honest tips on what you should be doing.
The first thing that Eric starts to talk about is the fear which many men have of rejection. The worst case scenario when speaking to a girl he says, is that they either have a boyfriend or they are not interested in you. The key to losing this fear therefore is to have enough self belief that its ok for someone not to like you. Eric reminds me that there are over 6 billion people in this world and it is impossible for everyone to find you attractive. If you understand this, Eric says that you will no longer be scared of them saying no.
Something else which Eric says too many boys do is to scout out their girl for hours before speaking to them, trying to make gestures and signs to see if they are interested. If you do this then you will lose the chance to speak to them and by the time you have plucked up the courage they may very well have company. Eric tells me that his approach was always to be very direct, see a girl that he finds attractive and then go and try and start a conversation with them. Eric says that so many people waste their chance because they wait too long.
When actually speaking to the girl Eric says that you must be careful about what topics of conversation you bring up. Most girls won’t be impressed by your lies about how much money you have or the job you do, so it is better to be completely honest. He also recommends avoiding relationship-style topics such as marriage, fidelity or anything of that like. The best course of action in Eric’s mind is to be honest and open, listen to what the girl is saying and try to find things in common which you can connect with her about.
Eric’s final piece of advice is to not let things drag on, have a quick chat, try to swap details and then you will know pretty quickly whether or not you have been successful.